The ‘Epstein files’ don’t have any scandalous dirt in them

OPINION:

Let’s cut to the chase, posthaste. The so-called files of the late convicted pedophile Jeffrey Epstein that everyone is suddenly talking about — again — don’t contain any dirt on President Trump. If they did, the unethical and unscrupulous President Biden would have released them.

I would repeat that, but this isn’t a podcast, so you can just go up a line and read it again.

All the hand-wringing and bloviating from the windbag Democrats demanding the release of the “files” is just that, a sudden growth of conscience by an immoral bunch of prevaricators playing politics.

Epstein (who gets no “Mr.” honorific because he was a skeevy perv) killed himself on Aug. 10, 2019. Or, more plausibly, didn’t. A guy who once shared his cell at the hellhole known as the Metropolitan Correctional Center in New York City said Monday that there’s “just no way” the convicted pedophile committed suicide.

“I spent seven months on that tier and in those cells. And the first thing I have to say is … there’s no way you are able to commit suicide. There’s just no way. There’s no way to hang yourself,” former mob boss Michael Franzese said on a podcast.

So wrap your head around that. Dude didn’t kill himself. He was whacked. Did former President Bill Clinton do it? Bubba invited Epstein to the White House at least 17 times during his presidency and rode on Epstein’s planes at least 17 more times in 2002 and 2003. Plus, if you believe some other conspiracy theories, the Clintons had more than 50 foes whacked. (Remember Vince Foster? Guy shot himself, wrapped himself in a carpet and drove himself to a park in Virginia.)

No, the Clintons didn’t “whack” 50 people, and no, the “Epstein files” don’t have anything on Mr. Trump, Mr. Clinton or anyone else. Perhaps they did at one time. Epstein was running a classic “honeypot” operation: Draw in the flies, catch them (on video, in Epstein’s case) doing, you know, what flies do, and then make bank. But all that is long buried.

Epstein, it’s worth noting, was worth in excess of $575 million upon his death. That was just money. He owned a town house on the Upper East Side of Manhattan valued at over $50 million, a mansion in Palm Beach, Florida, worth about $12 million, a ranch in New Mexico valued at just over $17 million, an apartment in Paris worth an estimated $8.6 million and two private Caribbean islands — Great St. James and Little St. James, aka Pedophile Island — together valued at $86 million.

Not bad for a former physics and mathematics teacher for teens at the Dalton School on the Upper East Side of Manhattan (until he met another pervy dude, who happened to be the CEO of the brokerage firm Bear Stearns, which crashed and burned in 2008 amid the subprime mortgage crisis. You should know; you paid to bail them out).

In his first cupcake case, federal officials identified 36 girls, some as young as 14, whom Epstein had sexually abused. Yet he was able to cop to “procuring a child for prostitution” and soliciting a prostitute in an absurd plea deal — orchestrated by jurisprudence god Alan Dershowitz — and served just 13 months in custody, with extensive work release to, you know, abuse some more young girls.

So what was with that sweetheart deal when he raped all those girls in 2006? Was he a member of Mossad, the Israeli intelligence agency? Is that why prosecutors went easy on him? None other than the spectacular “journalist” Tucker Carlson thinks so. Which, if you’ve been paying attention, means that’s not the case at all.

Wanna know what happened? Epstein facilitated a slew of rich, powerful men in raping young, vulnerable women. Simple as that. There’s no client list; they were all on his iPhone. He didn’t kill himself; the forces you just don’t know about took him out.

And it’s all too late to get to the bottom of it. Both sides, Democrats and Republicans, know their boys could be collateral damage, so they buried it all. End of story.

• Joseph Curl covered the White House and politics for a decade for The Washington Times. He can be reached at josephcurl@gmail.com and on Twitter @josephcurl.