Father’s Day lessons for life

OPINION:

This year on Father’s Day, I joined a slew of parents cheering on our sons in an end-of-season soccer tournament. In the semifinal game, our team was trailing 2-1 in extra time. When our coach asked how much time was left in the game, the referee told him this would be the last play.

My son, who has taken hundreds of corner kicks in practice and in games, delivered his corner kick just where his teammates expected it to be, setting up the game-tying goal before our team went on to win on penalty kicks.

Then they lined up respectfully to shake the hands of their opponents, then took their celebration to a local diner, where they enjoyed a post-game breakfast of homestyle pancakes, omelettes and bacon.

In spite of a tough loss in the finals later that day, our sons reveled in their friendship and the camaraderie forged in what I remember from my own youth on ABC’s “Wide World of Sports” broadcasts as the “thrill of victory and the agony of defeat.”

Most of the boys have been playing together the past two years for spring and fall seasons. While learning the game, our sons internalized the values of perseverance, communication and hard work. They developed tremendous trust in one another and team chemistry, which their selfless coach exquisitely nurtured with demanding but mirthful practices.

They discovered that empathy — being able to see the world through the eyes of one’s teammates and being able to see yourself through their eyes as well — drives high performance.

Our sons also learned some valuable lessons about respecting the game.

They appreciated their opposing teams for the high level of competition and for helping them bringing out their best. Demonstrating that the whole is greater than the sum of its parts, they overcame adversity and connected with something larger than themselves in a team game, which demands so much skill, athleticism and fitness.

Soccer is something like chess on grass, with an infinite number of moves, where every game is made up of its own unique passes, shots and goals. Each boy brought his own skills, some on defense, others with nifty passes, dribbling or powerful shots on goal.

Like so many other sports, soccer cuts across everything that divides us — especially politics.

The game is a great demonstration of freedom of opportunity. All that matters is how well a kid plays. And all it takes is a round ball to bring together a diverse group of kids who might otherwise never have known one another.

And the parents focus on what really matters: cheering on and supporting their kids.

Soccer leaves little room for subjectivity. After the game, both teams can largely agree on when they played well and the areas on which they would need more practice to improve.

Youth soccer has a way of reminding me of my decades-long career at CIA, where our ethos was “One team, one fight.” When I was planning undercover spy operations with my colleagues, rank melted away to informal communication, where everyone’s input mattered and each member of our team made an impact.

Our overseas field stations were full of officers with diverse skills and backgrounds, all focused on one collective mission: to deliver the timely intelligence on which the president relied to make the executive decisions vital to our nation’s security.

Having had the good fortune of getting to know so many of my son’s teammates during their practices, scrimmages and games, I would not be the least bit surprised if a few of them chose a life of public service. For sure, the lessons they learned in youth soccer will hold them in good stead, especially on Capitol Hill, where finding common ground is so often elusive.

When I was growing up, I used to think of Father’s Day as my dad’s holiday. We would enjoy a family meal and give him cards and homemade gifts. But after I had children of my own, I realized that Father’s Day is more about the gift of having a family and a celebration of mom, who gave our kids life and made me a father.

These days, when I’m asked what I do for a living, I say simply, “I’m a dad.” And every day — not just those sacred days when the kids play the beautiful game of soccer — feels like Father’s Day.

• Daniel N. Hoffman is a retired clandestine services officer and former chief of station with the Central Intelligence Agency. His combined 30 years of government service included high-level overseas and domestic positions at the CIA. He has been a Fox News contributor since May 2018. He can be reached at danielhoffman@yahoo.com.